In the news: Filipina commits suicide

From Korea Times, written by Cathy Garcia:

A Filipina woman committed suicide last week, after allegedly suffering abuse and forced prostitution by her Korean husband in Gongju, South Chungcheong Province.

Cathy Bonesa Mae Deocades, a 25-year-old woman from General Santos City, southern Philippines, was found to have hung herself at her home in Gongju on Jan. 11.

Before her death, Deocades was quoted by some of her friends in Korea and her family in the Philippines that her husband, identified only as Park, repeatedly abused her and tried to sell her to other men for sex.

Read the whole story in Korea Times.

And another story about immigrant wives… More immigrant wives seek divorce counseling.

UPDATE: Manila asks for tighter screening on Korean grooms

25 comments

  1. This is so sad at nkakapanginig-laman. The fact na nkahingi na pla ng tulong from our embassy yung victim pero nangyari pa rin sa knya ito. What a slap on the face of the Philippine Embassy! From the time that the victim’s family had called for help and the contradicting claim of the victim to be fine, they should have smelled something fishy and must have investigated deeper and monitored the said family. It’s a common sense!

    Given na ngpksal through broker para mkatakas sa kahirapan o kung anupaman. Nangyayari na at marami na nga yan ngayon so let’s stop blaming and finding excuses.

    Ang nakikita kong anggulo dito ay ang pgka-incompetent ng ating embahada. This incident just prove how incapable our embassy is in its responsibilities. This calls for our government to investigate the people in our embassy here in Korea kung ano pala ang ginagawa nila.

    Hindi lang 1.5 million won ang buhay ng isang tao. Wla kahit anumang presyo ang mkakatumbas nito. Sana ay mabigyang linaw lahat ng autopsy report . Justice to Mrs. Cathy Bonesa Mae Deocades.

  2. it is common for pinoys not to barge on marital issues..
    i guess it is very wrong to blame it on anyone…
    the mere fact someone did something to help,even if a thin line sana di na ngyari to i feel sorry for her
    though di ko alam ang tunay na side ng story..
    i had the same depression when i gaved birth i guess i’m lucky enough for my hubby on my side

    1. hi jelai! i also experienced some depression a few months after giving birth (PPD?)… my hubby was very supportive then and he even asked if i want to go out of the country for a vacation… thank heavens I did!

  3. my cfo batchmate tagged me some pictures of the victim in my fb accnt (mgkalapit-bahay lng pla kc friend ng CFO batchmate ko at yung victim). She is a morena-beauty. Accdng to the friend of my CFO batchmate, the victim was able to send a letter asking for help to the Philippine Embassy but it was just taken for granted. However, the news said our embassy checked on the victim. One thing more, the news said that it was suicide but the victim’s friends believe that she was murdered by her own husband.

    As for me, autopsy report pa rin tlga mkpglilinaw ng lahat. Sna yung totoo ang lumabas. And I hope na whatever the results convey, our embassy will execute appropriate actions. They did some preventive measures (CFO seminars, tightened policy on visa issuance {part of Korea}, and etc.), sana corrective actions din. Ano ang gagawin nila sa mga kababayan natin na naandun na sa sitwasyun. Oo nga at meron nmang mga support centers pero matutulungan ka lng pag humingi ka ng tulong (very reactive). Papa’no yung mga walng access at lalo na yung mga pinagbabawalang mka access? I hope our embassy can think of a proactive way for this. It’s possible nman siguro na may ugnayan ang immig centers at support centers like sa complete lists of migrants na nsa kanilang kinasasakupan at nang ma monitor nila ang mga ‘to. In this way, ang support centers na mismo ang lumalapit to offer help incase kelangan.

    1. Wala sa kanila yon, haha,, yung ibang asawa, naglelabor ang asawa, pero nasaaan sya, nasa videoke or namimingwit ng isda,, yung byanan din endi makikialam lalo’t babae ang iluluwal na anak,, hahaha pero kung may pera ang babae,, breadwinner pa,, Reyna sya…. hindi makaktulog ang asawang korean, at pallabasin pa nila na mabait ang korean na lalaki.. the Money does everything.. endi naman lahat, pero mataas ang porsyento.. anyway, life is life, like drama is like life, life is like drama, tsk tsk

  4. sana hindi mo na lang pinost yan fb o friendster accnt na yan…
    who may be that girl …she has a private life…or had a private lyf..
    kung sya nga yan…!!!
    what ammuses me how some people don’t know the word “respect”
    good heavens!!!
    let her rest in peace naman
    the word “hinanap” irritates me to fullest. . . .

    ps ate betchay pki-erase ung link pati post ko…tnx

  5. murdered, the korean can do it. I remember telling my korean husband that he doesnt have to kill their mother because of money. I live in miserable life here in korea, for so many years. (11) my husband married me because they need someone to take good care of her mother in law, to do householdchores, especially, the chores during their traditional holidays or anniversary. Walang gugusto sa kanilang magkakapatid dahil kahit ang bahay nila ay walang inilayo sa iskwater sa pinas, or maayos pa sa tin kahit na iskwater. Halos pinagtutulakan din ako ng asawa ko non kaya nga hindi nagbibigay ng pera sa akin. kahit ngayon, sa totoo lang, nag-aalala ako dahil madalas na akong magkasakit, walang ulam madalas,, kimchi, buti na lang maraming kimchi.. utakan lang ika nga, mas mautak sila at kaya nilang palabasin na kasalanan pa ng babae iyon,,

  6. I mean, they need me to take good care of their mother in law for free.. They have home for the aged here at may bayad, monthly, then kapag maganda pa trabaho ng manugang na babae,( Foreigner) sya pa ang magiging breadwinner, or talagang hindi na magtatrabaho ang asawang korean, gagawa na ng paraan pa para tuluyang makatanggap pa ng tulong sa gobyerno. yung naaksidente ang byanan kong korean, gusto ng asawa kong korean na ako pa ang magbayad ng bill,, namura ko sya, dahil sa nanay mong lasenggera, hindi kumakain at laging may sakit, pati mga anak ko, hindi ko nabigyanan ang kapal mo na ako pa ang magbbaayd ng hospital bill nya,, patayin nya ikako kaming mag-iina, kaysa tuluyang masisra ang ulo ko sa mga imposibleng gusto nila..

  7. Apektado talaga ako sa kasong ito, pati pagsusulat ko’y apektado eh,, running away from poverty pra sa mga dayuhan, escaping from responsibilities, physically at financially para naman sa mga koreans. Worst? di pa matitikman ng dayuhan ang respeto na kahit man lang para sa tao na lang..tsk,, tsk,,

  8. sad naman ako sa mga story nyo ,sana matulungan ng philippine embassy un mga filipino in anyway .my family is willing to help ..God bless us

  9. I am not going to say anything good or bad about this situation. As I stated before, the Soul knows what it is doing. People have to follow their emotions or trust their hearts.

    Yes, it is true, young Asian ladies often marry Korean men with the expectations of living a luxurious life and escaping the poverty they may be experiencing in their own countries. As I tell many young ladies, “Never marry for money.” Use the talents that God has given you to make your living. No one can force you to do anything, you really do not want to do. I have counseling ladies online and offline for years in Korea and in Thailand and the solution to all these problems is “Money”. I recently created a website “www.richyland.com” to show people that making money is just like playing a game. Don’t get serious about money. Have fun, enjoy your life and money will come from doing what you love.

    Finally, as for Korean men marrying these ladies mostly to demonstrate their control. They lure these ladies in with promises of a luxurious and happy life, but do not deliver. When the reality is revealed, most of these Korean men abuse their wives physically, mentally, and socially by forcing them to sell their bodies. This is terrible and total disgrace to humanity. I wonder what is the purpose behind all those churches in Korea? Like most things in Korea, it is mostly for show.

    So, please ladies, don’t be fooled by these devils (who think they are gods and kings). Looked withinn yourselves for answers and ways to make money to help your families.

    God loves you and is always watching you. You also have to be aware and watch for God. ^_^

  10. I share with your other readers the sadness in hearing these things happening to our kababayans. A sadder thing though is quite a number of them do really love their husbands! In law problems compound the problem. I have always thought that cross-country marriages are difficult and more support should be given by institutions, not only churches and law enforcement. Eh, as somebody from the Visayas married to a Kapampangan is hard enough, eh ano pa kaya between different nationalities and a foreign country. I think betchay’s blog is helping and maybe Pinay groups can be formed in each area where two or more reside. And makikialaman talaga if you detect a problem. Not like embassy people who just love to hear ‘walang problem’ to exonerate themselves from not doing anything more.

  11. How tragic! Kawawa naman! What kind of a husband is that???

    Filipinas who are seeking for Korean / foreigner husbands should carefully examine what kind of life and treatment they will be getting, not just the “privilege” of being able to live abroad.

Leave a Reply