Before finally deciding to marry my husband, I took the time to research about what life would be for me in his country. I didn’t really have a concrete idea on what life as a “foreign” married woman in Korea would be like since information on the net was rather scarce during that time. (And when I started blogging, I only knew of two other Filipina bloggers here in Korea – Anna Banana and Megastina – who is married to a Canadian. Both are not active anymore but I still keep in touch with Banana through Facebook. I’d never met Megastina since she was based in Daejeon and then Ulsan).
In the Philippines, women who are fiancees or wives of foreign men should attend a seminar conducted by the Commission on Filipino Overseas to “educate” them on what their lives would be once they immigrate. I found it degrading at that time (like I didn’t know what I was doing) but now I understand how important it is. While those marrying (or who are already married) to men in Western countries only need to attend a half-day seminar, those who are going to Korea and Japan are required to attend an extra two-day seminar that includes a one-on-one interview. After the seminar, the women are given a certificate.
As much as were informed on how different Korean culture is and what our chores would be, I don’t remember being told of what could happen to us if our marriage failed. (Fact is one would always wish for the best but it never always happen – so get an online life insurance.) What I found out are:
- The F-2-1 (foreign spouse) visa is sponsored by the Korean spouse. If the husband/wife divorces the foreign spouse, it would be almost impossible to renew the visa. One reason why one should never marry for convenience. Life in Korea isn’t as “convenient” as one might think
- A Filipino (even if married to a foreigner and is living in a different country) could not legally secure a divorce, which would prevent him/her from marrying again back home. Here’s some information on the net about “Judicial Recognition of a Foreign Divorce Decree“.
- Custody of the children is usually awarded to the father. I have a Filipina friend who was given the custody of her two kids when she got divorced. She eventually gave up her kids to her ex-husband since she thought they would be better off if they lived with their father.
What a Filipina (specifically) could expect from a marriage to a Korean?
- Expect to be an unpaid household worker. It is quite expensive to pay someone to do house chores. A wife is expected to do the cooking, cleaning and anything else that needs to be done at home.
- There are three important celebrations in Korea (that most married women dread!): chuseok or the harvest festival, seol-nal (pronounced seol-lal) or the lunar new year and jesa (ancestral rite). In all these occasions, a married woman is expected to stay in the kitchen and SERVE the family (and visitors). I hated my first Chuseok (which happened on my third week here)! I felt like a maid! However, my Korean sisters-in-law had to do more chores. The biggest pressure is on the eldest (not necessarily oldest) daughter-in-law. If one is to marry a Korean who is TRADITIONAL (and non-Christian), then expect to be a maid on these occasions. Or make sure that you’re marrying into a Christian family.
- Marrying a Korean man doesn’t only mean marrying the man himself but his whole family as well. In short, there will be times when you have to give up on that special date just because his family would like you to join them in whatever they wanted to do.
- The Philippines and Korea are only four hours away by plane, but our cultures are different. To this day, Confucianism is deeply rooted in this country. It’s outdated but still, read up on Confucianism to understand Korean culture better.
- If you are going to live with his parents, act appropriately. I met a Filipina online who constantly complained of her parents-in-law. She would spend an hour inside the bathroom and her PIL would bang on the bathroom door. While her husband was attending a conference, she would go out and not come back home till late at night without informing her PILs first where she’d go.
- Koreans love their food (I do too!). Your husband most likely will not eat your super-duper special adobo but he would expect you to cook and eat Korean food. YOU’VE BEEN WARNED!
- A Korean man’s salary might go a long way in the Philippines, but it could sometimes only get you to the neighborhood sari-sari store here in Korea. I once talked to a Filipina, on the phone, who married her husband through an agency. She wanted out. She said she just got married because she wasn’t sure she would get a Japanese entertainment visa. She thought that Koreans are as well-off in Korea as when they are in the Philippines. I thought she must be pretty. She said she didn’t know her husband is a taxi driver and that they have to live with his parents. She wanted to divorce and would like to go back to the Philippines. It’s IMPERATIVE that you get married to a man you know and not to someone you don’t even know the name of. And true enough, there are some married women here who don’t know their husband’s name. Of course, even years of dating wouldn’t guarantee that you know a man fully well.
- Career opportunities not in the line of teaching English are difficult to find if you can’t speak Korean. You’ll need the language to negotiate. My first job here, I worked at a news agency (first time I’m talking about it online). I lasted for three days – and I blame it on culture shock. Why? Next item please…
- Koreans may seem to be the hardest working people on the planet. Why? They spend so much time at their workplace. Even if working hours is from 9-7 PM for salary men, it doesn’t mean that a Korean husband would leave his office at exactly 7PM. They usually don’t leave the office until the boss has left. On our first year, my husband worked from 9AM-9PM. He’s home by 10PM. Thank heavens for Yahoo Messenger!They also spend AT LEAST one night a week to drink with their colleagues.
- If your future husband is working at a trading company and he sometimes travel, expect to do a lot of things on your own. And I don’t mean what every green-minded creature would be thinking.
A Korean man marrying a foreign woman, especially someone from SEA, is stereotyped as someone undesired by Korean women – uneducated, divorcee, old, farmer, living in the boondocks. If your (future) parents-in-law are not in favor of you marrying their son, it could be because of this dilemma. They don’t want society to think that their son is undesirable by Korean standards. However, if he still insists on marrying you then he must truly want you to be his lifelong partner. When there’s a will there’s a way. Sabi nga ni Judy Ann Santos: “kung gusto maraming paraan, kung ayaw maraming dahilan.”
Also, just because our cultures are different it doesn’t mean that we have to follow our husbands blindly. Days before our marriage, my husband and I negotiated on our future married life. One shouldn’t expect everything to be all rosy after the honeymoon. That’s when the actual marriage begins. It depends on how much you trust and respect each other that will predict the lifespan of your marriage.
In my six years here, I’ve had three Filipina friends whose marriages ended in divorce. The first one had been married for nine years with two adorable children. The second one was married for seven years before her husband decided to call it quits. (She gave a lot to their marriage and ended up with nothing.) The third one was married for twelve years to a very rich Korean man before she found a more romantic beau – her ex-husband was good enough to provide her with a huge alimony.
I might update this post later. If you guys have an input or two (violent reactions, additional information, etc) feel free to write on the comment section.
{ 70 comments… read them below or add one }
This post is very detailed, very informative and very true. Kaya people, women in particular, shouldn’t be blinded by money talaga. When i was in Korea last October, I noticed na mahirap talaga ma-differentiate ang rich and poor among the Koreans. Is it true din ba that Korean men prefer to marry foreign women kase “materialistic” and “high maintenance” daw ang mga Korean women? And that divorce will only be granted if you can prove that your husband (Korean)is at fault?
Finally, the kind of info that I have been looking for! Thanks, ate Betch. I’ve read other posts alike but quite superficial.
eden´s last blog ..When He Smiles
“On our first year, my husband worked from 9AM-9PM. He’s home by 10PM. Thank heavens for Yahoo Messenger!They also spend AT LEAST one night a week to drink with their colleagues.”
it’s good that your husband does not work for a startup company (venture kiup 벤처 기업 in Korean). For those Koreans who work for startup companies, working hours are even longer. When our company was in the startup phase, we worked until 3am, drank after stopping work until 5am, then slept until 10 am, then went back to work again. We drank almost everyday! And even worse, startup companies are almost always located in incubation sites far from Seoul, so those Koreans working for a startup company almost always live far from their immediate families and see them only during weekends.
algol´s last blog ..Mussorgsky Salonen
“Expect to be an unpaid household worker.”
For traditional households, I think that the boundary is quite clear. Men work and bring home the bacon, while the women do all the household work. I’ve lived with Korean men since 2002, and I could see that Korean men hardly do household chores. Our sink is always full, the toilet hardly gets cleaned, the floor hardly gets vacuumed, and so on… Good thing the company provided us with a cleaning ajumma who comes in once a week.
I could also sense that most married Korean salarymen live on an allowance. As in, their salary goes straight to the household funds (controlled by the wife) and they just take a monthly allowance. On a lot of occasions, some of my married colleagues would borrow small sums like 만원. I always thought something like “wtf, mas malaki sweldo mo sa akin, tapos nanghihiram ka?” Turned out, most of the time, they exceeded their allowance, hehe
algol´s last blog ..Mussorgsky Salonen
Hi Algol! We oftentimes underestimate the traditional role of a wife (because we’re so proud of being Westernized!). Unless we’re also bringing home some dough, it wouldn’t seem like we’re worth more than a household help. How could we expect our husbands to help at home when they have been working for more than 10 hours a day!
“Expect to be an unpaid household worker.”
i agree with what algol said. in addition, this thing is quite changing. i mean there are korean men who also do some household chores thesedays, ( esp. among young couples )Although there aren’t too many of them and maybe they ( men) still don’t do it very often, but at least they’re starting to go out of the traditional.
“How could we expect our husbands to help at home when they have been working for more than 10 hours a day! ”
tama naman c ms betchay! ^^
wow! ang ganda nito. hehehe. naaalala ko yung korean wife na nakausap namin. masaya siya kasi filipino ang mister niya. sabi nya ba naman eh “I encourage koreans to marry filipinos. they do the cleaning, they do the cooking, they do a lot of things…”
hehehehe. katuwa talaga!
Rickspot´s last blog ..Japanese’ Literal Half-Cooked and Alive Fish
positive yung pagtingin ng korean wife..^^
When I married my husband back in ‘97, I was totally clueless about Korean culture. When I attended the CFO seminar, it really freaked me out that it had to be a couple of days instead of just one day for immigrants to other countries. Back then, CFO said that they already shortened the seminar. Previous seminars had kimchi making lessons! I gave birth to our daughter in Korea in 2000, we moved back to the Philippines in 2001 and we immigrated to the US in 2003. I am now a US citizen and hubby maintains a greencard. We’ve been married for 12 years and we’re expecting our second child (a boy this time) in February. Hubby comes from a Christian family. When we were living in Korea (we lived by ourselves in Daegu, PIL lived near Pohang), I did try my hand in being the dutiful wife – cooking, cleaning, doing the laundry but hubby kept his fair share – going to the market, washing dishes… we would do groceries together. We were both working at one point until I had the baby. In the Philippines, he did less as far as chores are concerned because we had help at home (we lived with my parents and we had a nanny for my daughter) and we again were working. Here in the US, we have to do everything ourselves (no relatives around). We both do the groceries, we take turns cooking, we both share in cleaning the house, I do the laundry, hubby mows the lawn, I take my daughter to school and pick her up from school, we both help her out with her homework, etc. etc. We both work (I’m a registered nurse) and hubby has his own biz. Hubby thinks he is exceptional (rare breed kuno)as far as typical/traditional Koreans are concerned. I think he might be right. There are times that I think he can be stubborn in his ways as a Korean. But in general, he has been willing to adapt to my ways and upbringing as I am to his. It’s not all rosy…there had been ups and downs. But we’ve managed to compromise, give and take somehow, try to understand each other and still continue with our life together….
i was just browsing for some information about boys over flowers, then i come across this blog and read the messages about being a korean wife. I like your story so much. I do pray that your marriage will work till the very end. I am dreaming of marrying a Korean. There is this guy that I am truly attracted to who is a hairstylist at tony and jacky in angeles, pampanga. We’ve met just once when he was assigned in quezon city last december. I was his customer and we talked a lot of things while he was doing me the haircut. I promised him that I would give him a book to study english. On the day i was supposed to come back to see him again and give the book, he texted me that he had came back to angeles the night before. I am planning to visit him and give him the book one of this day. I want to get to know him well and start from there. I don’t even know if he will like me more then a friend. How I wish and pray he would…. My friends even my relatives keep telling me that Koreans aren’t nice people, is that really true. But the Koreans that I had met seems very warm, friendly and nice… Whom should I believe?
just know him first.. having a conversation is really a good start. just be your self.. reading more about korean culture also really helps..^^
we’re still trying to make a compromise on our roles at home. Since both of us are working, i refuse to do all the chores by myself.
giselle´s last blog ..moving on!
I’m the eldest son’s wife,have no mom-in-law,and those special occasions are celebrated here at home..we live alone though…
during the first few years after my mom-in-law passed away,we used to do everything here,because they say i am the first daughter-in-law,but i changed the law a little bit..kasi i have the power to do so.hehehe..at first i would get angry with my dongso(brod-in-law’s wife) masyado syang maarte..when we went shopping i drive..because she has no car..and when we got home,she would ask what time she should come the next morning for the preparations,if i say the time,she would always come after lunch when everything was already prepared for cooking,and when she came,she would just sit in front of the pizza pan and ask “hyongnim,where is this and that?” which is so irritating for me…so i told her “before you sit there,make sure you have all you need:”..
and then last year i changed the rule..we have rotations in cooking,if she makes the fried things for chuseok,she should cook the meat in seolnal..she said i am unfair..i dont think so, i reasoned like we are all children of our father in law,so we should share the workload..she would always say that i am the eldest son’s wife.but i would say our husbands are both their father’s children..and should have equal share..and if before we cook everything here at home,it’s not the case anymore,she cooks what’s assigned to her in their home and just bring here when she’s done..
i can’t expect my husband though to be like my brothers who help their wives in almost everything at home…but i am happy that he is my husband.
it’s only a matter of compromising,acceptance…it’s weigh and balance….
This is really very detailed. “Unpaid household worker”, eh? Well, then, I guess I just lost my chances hahas. Unfortunately, I don’t know how to do these things thought by men to be something that “every woman should know”. LOL.
Hi Rina! We had maids when I was growing up and I never had to do any chore. For the first few months of our married life, my husband did the cleaning and the cooking. I did the laundry because it was easy. I learned and felt ashamed that I didn’t know these things. Even now that I’m working I still cook and do the laundry, while my husband cleans the floor (because he thinks I couldn’t clean it as well as him).
Hi! I’m still here in Ulsan, and I check your blog from time to time. si Anna nasa Pinas na di ba? been here for almost 9 years now. My hubby is Canadian but still we had our own Korean struggles to share. All I know though is…it gets better.
we’re finally getting out of korea though. new adventure naman next year: sa Brunei! we have 2 kids now (Felicity is 4 and I have a 6-month old son)
take care and blog more!
Hi megastina! Wow mas maganda weather sa Brunei malapit pa sa Pinas.
ate maganda bang magtrabaho dyan sa koreakc my bf akong korean dt sa macau sabi nya sa akin pagbaLIK NYA NG KOREA KUNIN NYA AKO OK PO BD DYAN .THANKS AND GOD BLESS
what a very nice post..
have a question, is a 3500 usd salary per month in korea, below or above the current minimum salary range?
answer pls.
Hi apple! That is above the minimum salary range. Minimum salary here is only 4,000 won an hour (less than 4 usd) or about 800 usd a month.
oh thanks for that.. i really love this site and visit this everyday so please keep on posting more especially about korean culture and traditions..
ill be in korea on feb 2010, if you want anythin from the philippines just let me know. my pleasure to bring you some.
always take care and best regards
“Marrying a Korean man doesn’t only mean marrying the man himself but his whole family as well.”
That’s true of any culture, IMO. I’m an American, married to an American. You might not have them breathing down your neck 24/7 but they are still a part of your husband’s life and they helped make him the man you married. If you despise them, you will probably despise your husband too.
Tamar´s last blog ..1000 Subscribers on Youtube
Hi Tamar! I agree with you. When you marry someone, you’ll have to accept him warts and all. However, in some cultures it would be quite a shock to know that once you’re married to a Korean it’ll be like putting his family first above all including yours. It took me some time to understand this part of their culture. It is quite different from the Philippines where you and your husband can make your own decisions.
ryt!that does’nt mean u jaz marry 1 man but d whole famly!
but i dont regret!i have a wonderful fmily here in korea i luv my mother in law eventhough she have a loud voice and very maratrat!!nsanay n din cguro aq,but in my 1st yr.here in korea i wanted 2 go back in d phils.i regret i walk out in my work!but u have 2 be very patience esp.s aswa m kc #1 p rin s knila ang fmily and ur line at the end!gnun nla ka luv ang fmily nla kya dont b jeluz!esp.c nanaythey will ask 1st her opinion bgo kmi!buti n lng nanay q d2 iginaglang din nman aq!kc minamasahe q xa twing gbi,kya she luv me very much pinagmmlki nya aq!well,klangan tlga gumwa kau ng way pra mkuha loob ng byenan nyo or else mghihirap lng loob m!
I really like how detailed and informative this post is. Thanks for sharing it to everyone~
Just to pique my curiosity though, what would it be like the other way around? What if A Filipino man is married to a Korean and is living in Korea? What would the things he should expect?
Also are there a number of Filipino men that are married to Koreans and is living in Korea?
Forgive me if I may be misreading you on this one but it would almost seem that you hate your life as a houswife married to a Korean and living in Korea. True? Anyway,perhaps this is the huge difference in countries where people from different cultures are everywhere, like the US, and in places where there’s hardly a foreigner living in their midst. I wish you well on your life there in korea.
No, I don’t hate my life here as a wife married to a Korean and living in Korea. I love my life here and I love my husband and his family as well. I posted this article because I’ve been getting a lot of emails from Filipinas asking for advice about marrying a Korean man. Sort of like telling them what they could expect so they won’t be shocked later on and complain that nobody told them about life here.
lots of first hand information here. thank you for sharing and this is absolutely helpful to women/men marrying into another culture. i was just wondering if there are Korean women married to Filipino men that you have met there?
kayni´s last blog ..Finding Kayni
Hi Kayni! I’ve only met two Filipino men who are married to Korean women. One of the things they have difficulty with is making a living. Even if one is a foreign husband, he’s still expected to bring home the bacon.
This is an actual “fact” from an experience from a spouse who’s married to Korean husband, not just some bs stories that are lingering online. Truely the best information online!
thanks for the information… iv been staying here in korea for almost 3 yrs.. and married to a korean. iv been wanting meet u.. can u send me your email add or cell no. email me at:wea_p@yahoo.com
This is a very detailed article. I believe that it is very important to learn and understand the culture of the one you are marrying to. This would help your foundation with your husband.
gud pm betchay! salamat naba ko yung blog mo here.asawa ko po ay korean at may anak po kami lalaki,diko sya ibinalik sa knya andto sya sa pinas…bitchay give me your email add plsssssssssss….or add me katlyson@yahoo.com
hi sunkist! send mo na lang ako ng message sa “contact” kwento mo sa ‘kin istorya mo
Hello there Ms. Betchay! I’m Cerylhen from Makati. I have a korean boyfriend and we love each other very much.~
He’s 27 years old and I’m 18. There’s still a lot of time for us to share before getting married. Well, he said to me that’s it’s okay for him if I continue my studies for 4 years. But when I said after graduating, I need to fulfill 2 years working experience, he refused~ hhaha.. we have the same thing in mind. We both cannot wait for each other for 6 years! It’s too long isn’t it?~ But he said that he will find another way/ option~~~He has not yet proposed to me but he told me that he will retire from his work after 4 years (he’s an I.T. network developer) and put up his very own business. I think that’s the time when he’s ready to propose.
I’m concerned of what job could I have after 2 years of staying in korea?~~~~~
~~~~(as far as i know 2 years after marrying a korean will certify me as a korean citizen)~~~~ Could newly naturalised foreigners eventually apply for a stable and white collar job in korea?
What do you think of this scenario Ms. Betchay?
Ms. Betchay, just in case you need my contact email: cerylhenmodesto@gmail.com
I’m looking forward to your reply. ^^, You are a blessing to everyone.
Hi Cerylhen! You asked about my opinion right? I think you’re still young. Experience life first as a single woman. I met an 18-yr old Filipina here who got married to a Korean about 5 years ago. She said she wasn’t ready for life here so she returned home less than a year after she came here and got divorced. She went back to school and finished her degree. You might want to finish your studies first before getting married. If he’s already refusing your wishes, think about what could happen when you get married.
Hi cerylhen! i’m ping and I’m 19 years old. I also have a Korean boyfriend and somehow i could say that “we’re on the same boat!” hehehe. I can understand why you can’t wait to be with each other coz we are too.
yet i always remind myself that though i wanted it so much i’m still not ready for it. He already proposed to me and I already said my big “yes” but i told him that it doesn’t meanthat i would live with him in Korea after college. He knows my plan of going after my bother in London. Though he’s doesn’t agree to it a 100%, he does understand that i’m still young and it would be best for me if i pursue my dreams first before settling down. I think it’s really important that we think of the future first before we make decisions. If i would just listen to my heart, i will surely be rushing to Korea after receiving my college diploma. hehe ^,^
Hello, Dear Ms. Betchay! I am not from Filipinas, I am from Central Asia. My homeland is Kyrgyzstan. I have suddenly faced this blog and I am glad that there are some women who have experience of marriage to korean men and living in Korea. I am married to korean man too. We met first in Kyrgyzstan. He had worked there at the construction company and we lived there. Currently I live in Daegu. I have arrived here being pregnant in July 2009. In september I gave birth to my son. Now I have no any friends here and don’t attend any cultural classes due to the fact that my son is too small and keeps me constantly busy. So I was glad to know that I am not alone who experience such cultural shock. I don’t speak korean and cannot talk to someone except my husband who speaks poor English. I need to find some friends who speaks english, russian languages. Could you give me advice where can I find some kind of communication.
Thanks, with the best wishes Ella.
Hi Ella,
I can understand your situation. I married a Korean guy in 1997 and we lived in Daegu until 2001. I had my daughter in 2000, so that gave me time to adjust to Korean culture before I had a baby. It’s harder once you have a child to look after. When I was in Daegu, I attended Korean language courses at Keimyung Univeristy. Ask your husband to look into it, maybe you can enroll and it will really help you in being able to adjust and you won’t feel so isolated.(The classes are not daily, maybe just 2 or 3 times a week for an hour). I wasn’t really fluent, but I learned to communicate somehow like when I’m buying something from the market or grocery, giving the taxi driver directions, talking to my mother-in-law…You can also attend churches (I don’t know what your religion is) and meet other foreigners since there is usually an international community in places of worship. Good luck!
BTW, here’s a link to Keimyung University’s website…
http://www.kmu.ac.kr/
Hello Mrs. Betchay:
JUst a quick question. Am I qualified to visit Korea without a visa ? Im holding a work permit for Canada at the same time a re-entry visa and of course a confirmed ticket going back to canada. Im planning to visit south Korea before heading back to Canada. Hope you can help. Thank you.
Tessa
How about a Filipino man marrying a Korean woman?
Hi Betchay,
I am a Filipina married to a Filipino and leaving here in Australia for almost 9 yrs. now.
I have recently became a fan of Korean dramas and I came across your website while browsing the net.
I just wanted to say that I have been reading your blogs about your life there in Korea and I find it very informative.
Keep up the good work!
hello ms. Betchay…i really find this article very interesting. thank you so much for the information.
i’m also in a relationship with a korean. we’ve been together now for more than 2 years but it’s a long distance relationship. i’m still in my college years while he is already a working professional. he already asked me to marry him after college and live in korea with his parents. marrying him is not a problem at all coz i would love to spend the rest of my life with him but living with his parents?…it scares me. i already met his sister, though she has been so nice to me it doesn’t conclude that his parents would be too.right? i still have a year to think about that stuffs but i can’t help worrying about it and my future as early as now. i hope you can give me some advice ms. betchay. thank you!
hi ping! after school, find a job and enjoy your singleness… joke!
my PILs didn’t like me when i first met them, but now they’ve been telling me that i’m their favorite DIL
and as a matter of fact, they’d like to live with us… i don’t have any problem with that and i’d love it
…then i guess it all depends on the kind of PIL i will have in the future if I marry him.hehehe.i hope i could also be as happy as you are if it happens.
and rest assured that i will really enjoy my “after college” life first before i settle down with him in Korea. I’m already planning to go after my brother in London but when i told him about it, he’s kinda worried. He thought that it might ruin our plans. I don’t want to go to Korea yet after college coz i still want to work and earn money on my own. He’s coming over on the third week of the month, should i talk to him about the matter? wouldn’t it be too early to talk about?
It’s nice to hear na you’re In-Laws like you so much. Ang hirap pla maging wife ng mga Koreans. Sayang, gusto ko pa nman mapangasawa si Jun Pyo (Lee Min Ho) hehehehe
hi mrs.betchay
im so glad kz nbasa ko ung blog muh..grabe sobrang interesting sarap bsahin spcially for those filipina’s getting married with korean guy..im also married in a korean he is 40 yr’old and im 21..bgo plng akuh d2 sa korea nung dec’20 po akuh dmtng d2”and 3days ko plng nka2sama unh parents nya kasi kga2lng lng ng hospital.grabe sobrang naiilang tlga akuh kumilos kz d pn akuh mxado mrnong ng language nla’pati sa pgkaen nhi2ya akuh kmaen kasi sla yung nagpprepare ng foods..anu ba need kong gwin ms.betchay.?hindi padin kz akuh marunong magluti ng foods na kinakaen nla..help me naman po..amail mo sken yung reply mo..lynrobles_89@yahoo.com
thank u poh..more power..
hello im mila d2 ako ngaun sa macau kasama ko ung bf korean we live here morethan two years now. pero uwi na sya after two months from now tapos ako uwi muna pinas. tapos saka nya ako kunin punta dyan sa korea promise niya un pati mother niya nkasama ko dto sa macau.alam mo marami na akong alam na korean food at pati paggawa ng kimchi marunong na ako at pati pagbabasa ng language nila at pagsulat kc tinuturuaan ako ng bf ko para pagpunta ko daw dyan may alam na akong magkorean.nakakailang talaga pero sabi mo nga mabait ang beyanan mo.una mo munang pag aralan ang kimchi kc yan ang traditional food nila.
hi! curious lng ako tlga na mkapag hanap ng kababayan d2 sa place na tinitirhan ko ng mahanap ko ang site na to. actually, habang binabasa ko natatawa nlng ako kc sa ngaun unti unti ko ng nararanasan an ‘ISANG MALAKING PAG AADJUST’ sa pag aasawa ng korean. at heto nga, kasapi na ko sa mga dakila! dakilang ina at asawa dahil may anak na lalaki ang napangasawa ko. instant nanay na agad ang role ko, tnx d2 sa site nyo. at least khit pano po, may mkaka usap akong kalahi ntin d2. tnx po and more power….. godbless!
hi aileen! saan ka sa korea? isa talagang malaking pag-addjust ang pag-aasawa ng Korean at hindi natin malalaman yun hanggang walang magsasabi sa ‘tin… at lalo na kung hindi natin kilala ang asawa bago ikasal
d2 po ako sa namyangju, gyeonggido. actually, d2 ko rin nakilala ang asawa ako dhil b4 kmi kinasal eh nag work n ko d2 as entertainer. tnx po sa reply nyo, cyanga pla dami nyong fans… more power po, keep safe! tnx po tlga….
Hey Betchay. I really like what you’ve written. I am married to a Korean for 4 ears now and we have 2 kids. We’re staying here in the Phils now but come March we’re going to Korea and probably stay there for good. what you’ve written is really true coz even my korean friends kept on telling me that life in Korea is different from here. There’ll be no nannies to take care of the little tykes and you have to do the cleaning and all the other stuff. I’m actually afraid coz i dunno if i can do all of those things but home is where my husband is. so i’ll take the chance . and i’m keeping my fingers crossed that all will be well. i hope i can get to meet you. We’ll be staying in Seoul. Take care . Ciao
Hi Myla! Sure. When you’re here, just drop me a line and we can have coffee
Don’t worry about the chores. I am ashamed to admit that I didn’t know how to do them either, but my husband was patient enough to help me.
As I was reading all your notes, Ms. Betchay, I can feel how loving and supportive your husband is…I’m so happy for you!
Wala bang kapatid yan? hehe…joke lang po…di ba short tempered sila pero super sweet? Pakikiligin ka sa concern?
hi ms. betchay, thank you for creating this blog..after searching and browsing the internet where to find filipino community in Korea, finally i came to find your blog. if you dont mind , I just want to ask few questions about the cost of living in Korea. Right now ,we are living in Singapore. My husband got an offer to work in Seoul. He is considering to bring us there together with our 2 kids. My concern is about the cost of living. How much is the school fees, food, housing, electricity, etc? What is the salary enough to have an average quality of life in Korea? for this one, just want to make sure that he gets the best offer.
I will be very greatful with your reply ms.betchay. It’s one of the greatest factor for our decision as well.
Thank you! and best regards.
I was supposed to send you an email last night but my son had stomach flu. I’ll just write a post on this tonight.
Hi ms.betchay! how is your son? I hope he is ok now! Just take your time. I will just check my email from time to time for your reply. More power to you! God bless!
I don’t agree with the “unpaid housemaid” part. It’s very degrading to consider yourself a housemaid in your own house. It’s the responsibility of every married woman, working or not working to take care of household activities. If you do it because of your love for your family then you will not think it’s unpaid. One more thing,doing household chores is much easier in Korea because of technology. Life would not be convinient even in the richest country unless you will not work hard for it.
Next time I should be careful with the way I post things. I sometimes forget that my friends aren’t the only audience here.
However, I came from a country where household chores are done by paid house helpers; and I was quite shocked when I had to serve all the members of the family first (including the husband of my sister-in-law) and us daughters-in-law had to wait for them to finish before we could eat. I had never experienced that in my life before I came to Korea, so that was something new to me. Most of what I’d written in this post is meant for a Filipino audience and I’d think that they would somehow know what I’m talking about.
I agree with you that household activities shouldn’t really be a problem. Like I said, if one hasn’t done those things before they got married then adjusting is necessary. But ever wonder why even married Korean women complain about household chores especially during the holidays?
hi po ate betchay good afternoon po sa inio…pwd nio po vah aqng i add sa yahoo?marami po kz aqng tanong about married in korean please hope to hear me…e2 po email q chara_park45@yahoo.com
hi po ate betchay good afternoon po sa inio…pwd po request?pwd nio po vah aqng i add sa yahoo?marami po kz aqng katanungan about married in korean…hope you hear me…e2 po email q chara_park45@yahoo.com wait q po at sana i add nio q…salamat po ate at god bless po sa inio with your family:)
hi I am archie, wow! ang ganda nito. hehehe. naaalala ko yung korean wife na nakausap namin. masaya siya kasi filipino ang mister niya. sabi nya ba naman eh “I encourage koreans to marry filipinos. they do the cleaning, they do the cooking, they do a lot of things…”
I also wanna marry korean women, because I love their culture and foods and evrything about korea, I wanna marry a christian korean, I wanna work also in korea, I wanna go in korea but I dont know when is that yet hahahaha. I didnt see a filipino man married to a korean women yet. whats dat gonna be? if the case is like that?
hello po i have plan to visit in korea as tourist and hopefully marry to korean his not typical korean he graduated in stanford and he had been staying there almost 10 years in U.S , he did house hold chores as well ,hes very sweet guy we have been staying together for almost 9 months in philippines we had fight, arguing,and even attempt cool off on the goodside we even play hide and seek and even wrestling ,honestly im old enough to do such things im already 30 and his 34 i met him at club 526 launge in my work place i get attracted to him and after 2 years we met again and i decided living with him at rockwell however unfortunately buisness here in phil wasnt that good**coz hes biznz man**so he decided to go back in korea and start again for our future i feel very sad coz i thought wel stay here in the philippines for good my bf aswell does not want to go back in korea but he didand if evr his family doesnt like me may be there something wrong will hAPPEN TO US sooner,well ,as of now il do wat i can do for this relationship ……. il just think positive .tnx
This article is so true!
I’m also married to a Korean man and they are so traditional, conservative and nationalistic.
And i would like to add, Korean husbands in general, don’t want their wives to always go out (“lakwatsa / pagala-gala”).
When I was in the Philippines, I enjoyed my freedom so much. Gimik dito, party doon. Malling and coffee shop with friends, pag konti na-bored lang sa bahay, labas agad. In short, strolling around the mall and going out has always been my favorite hobby. But my freedom ended when I came here.
I love my husband, and i understand that he is just trying to protect me from possible danger luking around outside, but still…i miss going out.
wow.. this purely based on experience. thank you for sharing! i have another look about korean style/ culture. I’m into korea, kpop and everything. I also have plans yo travel to korea.. ^^ thank you! have a nice day! HWAITING!!
It’s really true about koreans being the most hardworking people. I had a korean boyfriend, and we have been together for over a year. I met his family in Korea, and they all liked me. I was the first girl he ever introduced to his parents. But when he started working, things began to change. He barely had time for me. Sometimes I don’t believe him that he is just busy with “work”. A simple text wouldn’t take so much time. My korean friends tell me that I should understand and just wait for him. But I didn’t and just broke up with him. Sometimes, I am thinking if I am at fault. Is it true that most Korean women do the waiting and courting? I’m a typical Filipina and it’s not in my blood to run after men.
Dear Mam,
Good day,
I have a problem regarding of my fiance that working at the korea.She gave me some documents needed to applying a visa here at Philippines Embassy late last month but after submit it was deny.Actually she are planning and invite me to korea to be getting married her.But suddenly the embassy not approved the invitation.What solution might be work regading our situation?She got divorse last Oct.2009 by korean man fyi.