A news headline on the Korean Times says that 80% of foreign wives won’t remarry Koreans. Surprising? Not really. And after reading the whole article you would understand why. From most of the women I know who are married to Koreans, the main complaint is the mother-in-law or sometimes the whole family-in-law. Sometimes, I try to tell them that interference by the mother-in-law is more of a universal issue rather than specifically Korean.
I have a friend who’s currently seeing a Korean. The first thing that I told her is to meet her boyfriend’s family first before considering marriage. In this country, when you get married you’re not only marrying the man but his whole family. Even Korean women complain about their traditional role as married women. What more if you’re a foreigner? It doesn’t matter if you’re working or not, you’re expected to do the traditional role of a housewife. You’re also expected to serve the family especially on the holidays. How does preparing the table for all the members of the family sounds to you? How would it feel to be spending money for your in-laws when you can’t even send money to your family back home? It pays a lot to know about Korean culture and Korean language as well to better understand why things are the way they are. It would be a great mistake to marry a Korean man for convenience, because life here is not convenient.
For now I would consider myself lucky that my husband’s family is not like the other Korean families I’ve heard of. I need not spend money for his parents. They wouldn’t even accept monetary contributions for the holidays. They don’t spend a lot of money on gifts as well. My parents-in-law have been very good to me and that they always try to make my life comfortable here. My sisters-in-law have been very helpful as well, trying to explain their culture to me. It’s just me who hasn’t really been exerting a lot of effort to learn, especially their language.
I guess what’s making life difficult here are the government policies. If you’re a Filipina who couldn’t speak Korean that well, your chances of getting a job is slim. Your family wouldn’t allow you to work in a factory and that the only decent job you can get is to teach English. Unfortunately, the government does not allow Filipinos to teach English legally. So for the two years that I’ve been here, I’ve never had a real job. And that’s when the necessity of changing your citizenship comes in.
No matter how advance Korea is with their technology, much of their culture is based on Confucianism. Keep in mind that men here are heaven while women are earth.
More than half of foreigners married to Koreans said they would not marry Koreans again if they were to separate with their spouses, a survey showed Monday.
The Corea Image Communication Institute (CICI) reported that 52 percent of foreign nationals married to Koreans have no intention of marrying a Korean again if they were given a second chance.
The report is based on a survey of 100 foreign spouses living here in South Korea or abroad.
About 80 percent of the female respondents said they would not marry a Korean man for a second time, while 58 percent of males said they would marry a Korean woman again.
Lack of dialogue, excessive interference of in-law family members in household affairs, an indifference toward housework and coming home late were among the main complaints of foreign spouses.
Full story: 80% of Foreign Wives Wonï¿½€™t Remarry Koreans